Newcastle Find New Owner

After the reports in The Sun today concerning the rumoured bid for Newcastle Football Club, we at the Spurt have intercepted the initial communication from Nigeria. Here it is, below:

"Thanks for your mail, I am really interested in your Football Club.I will pay £250 million pounds for it as I have been a lifelong fan of the mighty barcodes. Please i will want to indicate my mode of payment to you since i am not in the United Kingdom at the moment and there is a Company in the United Kingdom that is indebted to me in the amount of £347 million. So i will want to really seek your Assistance at this point,That i will want you to forward to me the the following informations below that i will need to forward to the Company indebted to me so that they can make out the payment directly to you and after you have cashed it in your bank,You will have the excess amount on the payment sent to my International Shipping agent via WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER ,All charges you are to pay at the western union office when sending the excess amount of £97 million should be deducted from my balance, So you don't have to bother yourself about that, if you find yourself short of funds for this perhaps you could sell a player or two? The reason for this is that,The Company indebted to me say they cannot make out the payment in two installment except once, And since i am purchasing your Football Club from you at this time,I will want to really be sure that my funds will be safe in your hands as i will want to entrust my money unto your care,So inorder for us to complete the purchase of the Football Club now,I will want you to get back to me with your full contact information inorder for me to forward it to the Company indebted to me inorder for them to make out the payment in your name and send it to you ithout any furtherdelay.

Do confirm this mail and get back to me as soon as possible. I'm really looking forward to owning Newcastle United and I'm sure I'll be a step up from the previous owners."

Now this email looks a bit fishy to us, but we're assured that it is the genuine article. And the last bit has a ring of truth about it ..