Mad Dog goes walkies

Alas, don your shrouds of mourning black and shed a remorseful tear today for Roy ‘mad dog’ Keane has departed this managerial coil.

Yup, while we were off piste with some work related nonsense yesterday, the now ex-Sunderland boss handed in his cards by text message and is off to walk Triggs in pastures un-footy related.

It’s not like we haven’t known it’s coming: The Jim Morrison-esque beard was certainly a sign things were going awry and never one to hold back, Keane had given some pretty strong hints over the weekend that he was living on borrowed time.

Still, in a career that’s been full of walk-outs (Ireland), bust-ups (Man Utd) and hefty challenges (the pitch), you have to admire Keane as an uncompromising, forthright individual who was determined to do everything, including his departure, on his own terms and feck the consequences.

His weekly pronouncements on the game and the people and business surrounding it were riveting if controversial reads and the footballing world is definitely a greyer, sadder and certainly less interesting place for his departure.

Few of us get to choose the manner of our leaving, but Keane has always managed to do it in his own inimitable way, and we leave you with just one of his memorable gifts to the English language “stick it up your bollox".

Feathered friends

They say never work with children or animals – a sentiment we’d heartily endorse after that incident with the toddler, the chainsaw and that spare bag of ferrets.

Still, it’s news from the stranger side of spurt today, with a number of incidents provoked or inspired by our furry or feathered friends.

First up Man United’s relatively poor start to the season has finally been explained and nope it’s not the global hair gel shortage which has affected Ronaldo, nor indeed the loss of Rooney’s locks which have resulted in a Samson-like reduction of the spud faced nipper’s pace and power.

Nope according to the super soaraway Sun (fascist rag) it’s all down to Man Utd’s training ground sessions being disrupted by dive bombing geese flying in from a nearby nature reserve.

Perhaps they were after that mouse Anderson concealed in Garry Neville’s shirt? Surely the most tenuous (for which read piss poor) story of the week from the Mirror.

Elsewhere Roy Keane’s dog has made the news as the Sunderland boss admitted "There are ex-players and ex-referees being given air-time who I wouldn't listen to in a pub... I wouldn't trust them to walk my dog."

From ‘mad dog’ Keano that’s quite a thing to say, but rumours that the mutt is being lined up to dunk his paws into the Newcastle poison chalice are believed to be wide of the mark.